Forever ... yours for only 41 cent
Forever ... yours for only 41 cent
By Amy Dickinson
Copyright © 2007, Chicago Tribune
Published March 27, 2007
I was in the post office today pondering the foreverness of forever.
Normally a trip to the post office leads only to daydreams about jumping the queue and encasing the clerk in bubble wrap, but today I found myself philosophizing about forever.
I love a deal. I'm also prone to gimmicks and fatally attracted to paper envelopes topped by tiny adhesive squares, so when the Postal Service announced that it was introducing a first-class stamp that could be purchased for 41 cents and be valid ... forever, I was hooked. And skeptical.
When I finally reached the front of the line, I asked the clerk: "How long is forever?" She looked at me and said, "Whenever."
"Is forever until the end of time?" I asked.
"Yes. The end of time," she said.
Or until the next capricious rate hike. Whichever comes first.
Forgive me if I have trust issues, but with 13 rate hikes since my first stamp purchase (Village of Freeville Post Office, 1974, 8 cents), I'm inclined to believe that for the Postal Service forever is like a Britney Spears marriage -- well-intentioned but not quite eternal.
I'm entranced by forever as a concept, but disappointed by forever as a measurement of time. Too often, we humans get ahold of the diamond-hard idea of forever and twist it to our own purposes. Forever is a promise that seldom delivers. It lasts only as long as we decide. In fact, there is every likelihood that our relationship with the 41 cent "forever stamp" will outlast some relationships with the people in our lives.
All the same, I'll be a sucker and buy the stamps. In fact, I'll probably buy several rolls of them, thinking that I am hedging against inflation.
I'm smart like that.
And then my forever stamps will languish in the "stamp drawer" in my home, along with all of the hundreds of now extinct stamps of various denominations (along with the dozens of 1- and 3-cent "makeup" stamps). I'll not affix them to the dozens of Christmas cards I never manage to send, the thank-you notes that get written only in my mind or those thoughtful letters that I never seem to get around to composing.
And there they'll stay. Forever.
----------
adickinson@tribune.com
By Amy Dickinson
Copyright © 2007, Chicago Tribune
Published March 27, 2007
I was in the post office today pondering the foreverness of forever.
Normally a trip to the post office leads only to daydreams about jumping the queue and encasing the clerk in bubble wrap, but today I found myself philosophizing about forever.
I love a deal. I'm also prone to gimmicks and fatally attracted to paper envelopes topped by tiny adhesive squares, so when the Postal Service announced that it was introducing a first-class stamp that could be purchased for 41 cents and be valid ... forever, I was hooked. And skeptical.
When I finally reached the front of the line, I asked the clerk: "How long is forever?" She looked at me and said, "Whenever."
"Is forever until the end of time?" I asked.
"Yes. The end of time," she said.
Or until the next capricious rate hike. Whichever comes first.
Forgive me if I have trust issues, but with 13 rate hikes since my first stamp purchase (Village of Freeville Post Office, 1974, 8 cents), I'm inclined to believe that for the Postal Service forever is like a Britney Spears marriage -- well-intentioned but not quite eternal.
I'm entranced by forever as a concept, but disappointed by forever as a measurement of time. Too often, we humans get ahold of the diamond-hard idea of forever and twist it to our own purposes. Forever is a promise that seldom delivers. It lasts only as long as we decide. In fact, there is every likelihood that our relationship with the 41 cent "forever stamp" will outlast some relationships with the people in our lives.
All the same, I'll be a sucker and buy the stamps. In fact, I'll probably buy several rolls of them, thinking that I am hedging against inflation.
I'm smart like that.
And then my forever stamps will languish in the "stamp drawer" in my home, along with all of the hundreds of now extinct stamps of various denominations (along with the dozens of 1- and 3-cent "makeup" stamps). I'll not affix them to the dozens of Christmas cards I never manage to send, the thank-you notes that get written only in my mind or those thoughtful letters that I never seem to get around to composing.
And there they'll stay. Forever.
----------
adickinson@tribune.com
posted by Carlos T Mock @ 10:37 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home